| |
| |
|
Coaching Information |
|
|
|
Do You Want to Impress Others? Then Don't Talk ?Listen
Recently my friend Michelle was concerned about a professional conference she was planning to attend with her husband, a veterinarian. She has no background in veterinary science, so she did not think she would be able to effectively communicate with the people at the conference. I asked her why she thought she had to use technical jargon when she spoke to the other conference attendees. She responded that she wanted them to think well of her. Michelle is a warm, caring individual who is genuinely interested in others. I assured her that she could effectively relate to the people she met by asking them questions about themselves and their businesses instead of trying to impress them with her knowledge of veterinary science. Many people, especially in business situations, are very concerned about what they say to others. Before an event, they might even think of things to say about themselves so others will perceive them in a positive light. They try to dazzle people with stories about their successes hoping this will impress them. What they may not realize is that most of us are not that interested in the accomplishments of other people. We are, however, very interested in our own achievements and we relish the opportunity to describe them (often in great detail) to anyone who will lend an ear. Unfortunately, we don't usually get the chance to do so because most people are more interested in talking than listening. Listening is an under appreciated aspect of communication. When you carefully listen to others, you impress them in ways that talking can never accomplish. You are letting them know you care about them and they appreciate it. How many people have come up to you lately and said, "You're listening to me too intently. You're valuing what I say too much. You're making me feel too good, so stop it now!" I don't think you've had a long line of people with this complaint and I doubt that you ever will. People are starving for the attention that conscious listening can give. These people include prospects, clients, supervisors, co-workers, family and friends. Most people are so unaccustomed to being listened to that when someone takes the time to do so, they are often amazed. My friend Sandy is a professional coach. She listens carefully to what her clients say about their fears, hopes, and dreams. When she relates back to them what they have just said, they will often respond "How did you know that? You're so intuitive. You have such great people skills." They attribute Sandy's comments to the fact that she must be a tremendously talented coach to be able to know them so well when, in fact, all she did was listen. The key to being an outstanding communicator is not so much the words of wisdom that come out of your mouth, but how well you listen to the words of wisdom that come out of the mouths of others. As for Michelle, she listened intently to the people that she met at the conference and soon had them eating out of her hand. About The Author Della Menechella is a speaker, author, and trainer who inspires people to achieve greater success from the inside out. She is a contributing author to Thriving in the Midst of Change and the author of the videotape The Twelve Commandments of Goal Setting. She can be reached at della@dellamenechella.com. Subscribe to free Peak Performance Pointers e-zine - send blank e-mail to mailto:subscribe@dellamenechella.com.
MORE RESOURCES:
Coaching - Google News |
|
|
|
RELATED ARTICLES
Personal Strategic Planning I have a few questions for you ---What if we as individuals adapted and utilized some of the same tried and true processes and methods that have given businesses the edge they need to succeed over their competition? My sense is that understood and implemented correctly professionals would be able to gain the same competitive advantage. Remarkably, this is not anything overly complicated or new and I can't take credit for developing it. How to Tune In Your Brain & Feel Confident with People in Moments One day when I was in school, many years ago, the school principal wandered into our class room, sat down and started to talk.He talked and talked; and there was nothing we could do to stop him seeing as how he was in charge!For once he actually said something that interested me and I never forgot what he said. Attitude is Contagious - Would Anybody Want Yours? Are you using the Life Potential you have been given? Or are you just existing?We have all inherited standards, traits, habits, perceptions, and expectations based on what our parents, teachers, and peers taught us. We have allowed these to grow as a result of whatever we then learned as adults, and they continue to grow with whatever we feed our minds. Why Daily Planning is So Important for Adults with ADD For adults with Attention Deficit Disorder (ADD), details are a drag. We tend to see the big picture and want to jump straight to the finish line, wishing we could skip all the steps in between. A Murder Mystery Puzzle for You to Solve Anybody who has visited my website at Motivation & Self Esteem for Success or has read any of the many articles I have written will realise what a proponent I am of reading books and educating yourself. If you want to become successful at anything you simply must do this, in my opinion. Choosing The Perfect Coach So, you're ready to start coaching. You either have some issues that you think a coach can help you overcome, or you just think it's time for a quality of life tune-up. The Real Truth About Working Smarter, Not Harder Running a business or department can often stretch you to the limit.To be effective at doing what you do best, it's imperative to look at what tasks you can either delegate or outsource. Who Do You Talk To? Many of you reading this will be running businesses, or parts of, whether they are your own or not. This means that you have many things to deal with on a day to day basis plus trying to do the long-term thinking needed to lead and run the business. Identify Your Two Rich Horses The naked truth of person is that we are still slaves to our mind; means we are still a "bounded slaves" to our mind. The use of mind in constructive way or in some stepping-stone turning way is still not being revealed by human being. How to Turn Around A Sinking Conversation - 7 Tips When a conversation is not working out there is the potential for massive frustration or a breakthrough depending on how you look at it.1. Home For The Holidays In my husband's family, family members send Christmas cards to other family members (parents to children, brothers and sisters to one another, etc.) even though the family always spends time together at Christmas for a meal and gift exchange. Executive Coaching and the American President Perhaps no one better than a former U.S. What The Buddha Says About Coaches There is a Buddhist saying that goes like this: "If you meet the Buddha on the road, kill it." This means to kill any concept of the Buddha as something apart from oneself. The Story "From the Chicken Coop"? Many years ago my grandfather, had a small farm and chickens. One morning he sent me out to the chicken coop to collect fresh eggs. Passport to Passion Passion is a feeling of excitement and intensity. The energy of passion fuels a fulfilled life, and supports the growth and development of our personal purpose and potential. Mind the Gap The underground train in London can get you anywhere when you know how to maneuver all the options. Like our subways, London under ground is a busy place. Coaching vs. Directing - How Does Improv Theater Suggest You Should Lead Your Team An age old battle in improv that I believe resonates well with challenges we experience in the business world is the question of whether a team should have a coach or a director (in which case it should be called an ensemble). In addition there's the third option of the self coached team, which I will call committee from here on forward. The Adventure Attitude Of the 60,000 people who lived to be over 100 in the United States in 2002, the single most important characteristic they had in common was their ability to be positive in the face of change. They were able to look at things objectively, put them in perspective and move on. Key Questions for a Coaching Conversation There are 2 key skills that coaches need to be truly effective, the ability to listen (often for what is missing rather than what is said) and the ability to ask the right question at the right time.Now in reality there are no 'right' questions, there are however some very good, and fairly generic questions that when asked which can make a significant difference to the way in which a coaching interaction progresses. Curbing the Public Nuisance (Part 2) Yes, that pillar of society that has been with us since that slithery dude threw humanity for a curve in the Garden of Eden - that cornerstone of society has been automated.I am speaking, of course, of the public nuisance ( I wrote about him in Part 1 at http://www.
|
| home | site map |
| © 2006 |
