Holidays Information

Single During the Holidays


Mistletoe. Holiday parties. New Years kiss at midnight. This time of year can be challenging for singles. With such an emphasis on family togetherness and couples exchanging heart-felt gifts, it's hard not to hear the message - the holidays are not for me.

At family get-togethers you get grilled about what's going on in the "romance department." In-laws, whose company you cherished all year long, become reminders that you don't have a "special someone." No singles shopping for gifts appear in the barrage of holiday commercials. If you are single, and not dating anyone, these holiday images can lead to emotions ranging from sadness to depression.

So, what is the best way to combat the holiday blues? Although the following strategies can be applied throughout the year, they are particularly useful during the holidays.

Don't deny your feelings.

Emotions are neither right nor wrong. They are just how you feel about your situation. Allow yourself to be sad, without the guilt. However, be conscious of how you act on your feelings. Actions to emotions can be right or wrong. Anticipate before going to family events how you will handle dating status questions. It's best to have a pre-planned strategy of how to politely change the subject. When asked about your love life, a simple, "There's no news in that area, but here's what I am doing at work", might be just enough to redirect the conversation.

Adjust your view.

See the couples in your life as you have seen them throughout the year. They haven't really changed. Only the environment in which you see them has altered. Anticipate whom you will be meeting during holiday events. Have fond memories ready to share. Take time to remember and cherish why they mean so much to you.

Be a successful single.

A life partner enhances who you are - they do not "complete" you. Understand that you do not need another person to make your life whole. Take this time to discover what the holidays really mean to you and start your own holiday traditions that reflect your personal values. Realize and appreciate that this is a stage in your life - not a reflection of who you are.

Break traditions.

Who says you have to spend the holidays a certain way? Maybe serving meals at the homeless shelter is more in keeping with your values, than "shopping till your drop." Take some of the time you would spend with family and share it with the folks at your local nursing home. It is easier to justify limiting your time at the uncomfortable holiday functions when you have a good excuse.

Change your latitude.

If visiting the family or attending holiday functions is really going to be overwhelming, cut your visits short and take a single's cruise or an island vacation. Let the couples be reminded of the benefits of being able to pick up and go.

Limit or avoid alcohol.

Alcohol is a depressant and will intensify your feelings of sadness. Accept that you are feeling sad and handle the emotion as you would any time during the year. Do things that will bring humor into your life. Rent funny movies to offset the holiday features that are shown this time of year.

Give yourself the gift of home.

If you have not made your house or apartment your home, consider doing so. Fill your home with things that reflect who you are. Many single's homes are nothing more than storage for their "stuff". The art you choose says, "This is me." Buy some. Add some color to your home. Let gift givers know what you would like for your home. Set needs aside for once and focus on wants.

Being single during the holidays can be difficult, but it doesn't have to be traumatic. Anticipate bumps in the road and plan accordingly. Take ownership of the holidays and create your own traditions. Limit your time at holiday events that bring discomfort by volunteering for local organizations. Remember, there are no set rules for how to enjoy the season - find out what works for you and "have a happy holiday."

About The Author

Ron Prewitt is a Relationship Coach in private practice. He helps singles and couples with creating loving, nurturing, and supportive relationships in their lives. For more information call (702) 460-6489 or visit www.ronprewitt.com

rprewitt@gte.net


MORE RESOURCES:

The Maddie factor that will haunt this year's family holidays
guardian.co.uk, UK - 39 minutes ago
We needed to book a holiday suitable for small children. Which is how I came to be scrutinising an internet site for a family holiday company. ...


Home swapping provides a break from pricey holidays
Scotsman, United Kingdom - 41 minutes ago
By Emma Lunn FANCY a week in a villa in Florida or a cabin in the Swiss Alps but can't afford peak season prices charged by holiday companies? ...


Times are tight – but there’s always cash for a holiday
Independent, UK - 37 minutes ago
There may be trouble ahead, but they aren’t keeping holiday-makers at home. In fact, the the travel business is reporting continued growth. ...


Farm holidays put vacationers in touch with the land
Vancouver Sun,  Canada - 15 hours ago
But that's exactly what TLC's upcoming farm conservation holidays are all about. You can sign up for holidays at Duck Creek Farm on Saltspring Island from ...
Farming becomes sexy Vancouver Sun
all 2 news articles


Meanwhile, look who's heading off on holidays
Sydney Morning Herald, Australia - 10 hours ago
... work was going on as normal, it appears Ms Neal, who last Thursday finally agreed to a police interview about the dinner drama, is planning a holiday. ...


KBCI CBS 2

Record gas prices keep people home for the holidays
KBCI CBS 2, ID - 23 hours ago
... but just last year Idahoans were paying $3.15 a gallon of gas. AAA says it's the reason why Americans are staying home for a second consecutive holiday.


Fewer holidays this year as money's tighter
TravelBite.co.uk, UK - 7 hours ago
Brits will take fewer holidays this year as rising inflation and the credit crunch make money tighter, according to the latest poll by Norwich Union. ...


Mortgage holidays 'can be effective'
Saveborrowspend.co.uk, UK - 7 hours ago
Opting to take a mortgage holiday can be a useful tool for some borrowers, one expert has claimed. Although taking a break from payments may not be the best ...


Arsenal Soccer Schools in the holidays
Bridgwater Mercury, UK - 8 hours ago
ARSENAL Soccer Schools are running six days of coaching courses locally over the school summer holidays, while an ex-Premiership player is also holding a ...


Are you being green washed?
guardian.co.uk, UK - 41 minutes ago
Responsible Travel promises 'hand-picked holidays from hundreds of specialist operators who care about the environment and local people'. ...

Holidays - Google News

home | site map
© 2006