Marriage & Wedding Information

Make Sure You Do: Before You Say "I Do"


Tina Turner asked an important question in the title of her hit song; What's Love Got To Do With It? Yes love is important but love don't pay the bills. It is not be enough to be "in love." Couples must have the basic skills necessary for building and enhancing the relationship over time. Lasting marriages require partners who are committed to respecting one another, who have gained knowledge about what makes marriage work, and who have developed skills that will enhance rather than deteriorate the relationship.

It is mind boggling that so many spend countless hours planning for the great wedding day. That's right; it is only for one day; a mere drop in the ocean of time. Here today, gone tomorrow; then what? It is just plain ignorant to spend numerous weeks and even months planning for the wedding that last a day and ignore the marriage that is expected to endure for a lifetime. It makes good sense then, to spend at least an equal amount of time preparing for married life. By reading this article, you have taken the first step toward increasing your awareness. I applaud you.

Whenever I perform a wedding ceremony, it usually includes these words:

Do you promise to love, honor, cherish, and protect him/her, forsaking all others and holding only unto him/her according to God's holy law; and thus pledge your faithfulness.

It is disconcerting that nearly half of all married couples regretted uttering those profound words and have since divorced. I believe that the most egregious mistake these couples made was not spending enough time seriously planning for a lifetime together in marriage. Though most couples do claim to take their wedding vows seriously, often what has been disregarded is really getting to know each other on a level beneath the surface.

Women, particularly, seem to approach marriage from a fantasy "happy-ever-after" mentality. We do not seem to realize that what we think we "see" is not perfect reality. And, what we think we feel is related to what we think we see. In other words, we tend to approach marriage with a distorted perception of what married life will be like. In a way, it can be analogized to an adolescent girl who always wanted a baby until she actually had one and the reality of parental responsibility ferociously slapped her in the face; or the teen young man who didn't understand that as soon as he hit adulthood, the system would relentlessly seek child support payments from him for each child he has fathered.

Keep in mind that who you marry will have a dramatic impact on all aspects of your life; spiritual, emotional, mental, and physical health. Marriage is serious business and should be given serious thought. It is not optional, it is obligatory. Take a long and hard look before you leap.

Rev. Saundra L. Washington, is an ordained clergywoman, social worker, and Founder of AMEN Ministries http://www.clergyservices4u.org. She is also the author of two coffee table books: Room Beneath the Snow: Poems that Preach and Negative Disturbances: Homilies that Teach. Her new book, Out of Deep Water: A Grief Healing Workbook, will be available soon.


MORE RESOURCES:

Going Out: The Secret Marriage: Wedding Daze
RedOrbit, TX - Oct 4, 2008
By Kenneth Walton DOMENICA CIMAROSA HAS suffered understandably from a mixed press. That was partly due to an accident of birth. Slightly older than Mozart, ...


Daily Mail

It's over: Trinny Woodall leaves her wedding ring at home as she ...
Daily Mail, UK - Oct 12, 2008
By Daily Mail Reporter Fashion critic Trinny Woodall is to divorce her husband of nine years after a four-month battle to save her marriage failed. ...


Is my fiance using me for my money?
NEWS.com.au, Australia - Oct 6, 2008
Dear Bossy: My question relates to my fiancee. We have been going out for eight months and recently I asked her to marry me, to which she said “yes”. ...


BBC News

What choice now for the Big Day?
BBC News, UK - Oct 1, 2008
By Victoria Bone Couples in England now have a greater choice about which church they can choose for their wedding. They can marry anywhere they have lived ...
Wedding Bells Ring In Legal Change Sky News
all 120 news articles


Readers recommend: songs about machines, robots and computers
guardian.co.uk, UK - Sep 25, 2008
Pocket calculators at the ready ... how many Kraftwerk nominations will get donded this week? Photograph: Reuters If I had listened to the recommendations ...


Wedding superstitions and customs
Culpeper Star Exponent, VA - Oct 5, 2008
Well, it’s official! The date is set and the church is confirmed. Steve has been over here for the past week so as you can imagine it has been a bit of a ...


The facts of life: marriage
Independent, UK - Sep 15, 2008
The number of marriages in England and Wales that were the first marriage for both partners peaked in 1940 at 426100 when 91 per cent of all marriages were ...


PGI, GroomGroove.com host proposal contest
National Jeweler Network, NY - Sep 25, 2008
New York—Platinum Guild International (PGI) and engagement and wedding Web site GroomGroove.com have partnered to launch a marriage-proposal story contest. ...


Post Chronicle

Jimmy Smits Stabs Stuntman and Howard Stern Takes Second Stab At ...
Post Chronicle - Oct 4, 2008
Howard Stern finally took a stab at marriage, wedding longtime girlfriend Beth Ostrosky. Smits grabbed a real knife instead of a prop knife during shooting ...


《欲望都市》:Auld Lang Syne
浙江都市网, China - Sep 16, 2008
恋恋不舍的我们和恋恋不舍的Sarah Jessica一起走回四年前的那个city。 电影看完,我翻了最后一季的大结局出来看。不管是第多少遍,总是在Carrie低头拣钻石Big走进旋转 ...

Marriage-Wedding - Google News

home | site map
© 2006