| |
| |
|
Relationships Information |
|
|
|
The Womans Guide to Younger Men
I often awake to find Beverly, my older wife, wrapped around me like a Virginia creeper. In the nineteen years since we met, she has shown me what true love is, and I couldn't live without it. For the first time, I have someone who wants me as much as I want her. Falling in love with an older woman is the best thing I ever did, and I'm not alone. The percentage of women marrying younger men doubled over the past two decades, and women marrying for the second time are seven times more likely to marry a younger man. Listen to women with younger husbands or lovers and you'll hear:
If you haven't discovered the joys of a younger man, it's probably cultural. Close your eyes and imagine a romantic couple snuggling together. One person is older and distinguished; the other is young and sexy. What do you see in your mind's eye? If it's an older man with his second (or third) wife, you're not alone. Hollywood is run by men, so it's hard to escape their fantasies. Perhaps it's time to rewrite the script. Women who consider younger partners triple their chances of finding the love they deserve. More importantly, older women and younger men enjoy equal, open, and exciting relationships. As one forty-seven year old divorcee with a twenty-eight year old lover says, "Younger men are just more fun." The first step in finding the right partner is to know more about yourself. What are you passionate about? Think about people, places, objects, issues, careers, organizations, and hobbies. Write down several, starting with the most important. Close your eyes and imagine your ideal soulmate. What things must you share? What's "negotiable?" (Careful, this doesn't mean ignoring your feelings, denying deeply held beliefs, or trying to change someone else). What's "non-negotiable?" Imagine yourself on your deathbed. What are three things you wish you had done? This may seem like a curious way to find a mate, but sometimes we're too busy living our lives to question whether it's the right life. Think about what you really want, not what you think you should want. This might include raising a family, succeeding at your career, building a business, fighting for an issue, or finding a spiritual community. We all have many roles in life, but pick your top three priorities. Now look in the mirror and remember yourself ten years ago. Didn't you have many of the same hopes and dreams then that you have now? Imagine the ideal partner for your younger self. Before thinking "he's too young for me," ask, "too young for what?" It might be time to "think again" about younger men. If you can't imagine yourself with a younger man, let your interests, aspirations, and values guide you. The best way to find someone worthwhile is to become the person you always wanted to be. By being good to yourself and others, you help people become better and you attract better people. Visualize doing something with your soulmate (no, outside the bedroom). Where are you? Browsing at the local bookstore? Jogging? Building homes for poor families? If you're looking for the right person, you can meet your ideal partner anytime, anywhere, doing almost anything. The most important thing is to be yourself rather than pretending to be someone you think others will want. Remember the "rules" for women that advised: "Don't talk to a man first" and "Don't call him and rarely return his calls"? You can make your own rules by understanding that age is an asset. If you believe in yourself, you'll look for someone to complement you rather than complete you. Start by being less concerned about whether a man is older, wiser, richer, taller, or all the things you might have wanted when you were sixteen. the most important thing about a man is his character. Younger guys may need guidance, but we all teach others how to treat us, and older women are better teachers. No matter what your age, you don't need to change the world to find love, sometimes all that has to change is you. If you are open to a different kind of relationship, a younger man will appear in your life. It happens all the time. About The Author Copyright 2004 - Chris K. Olander Chris Olander, author of The Ageless Love trilogy at http://www.youngerlover.com, is Executive Director Emeritus of two private foundations in New York City. He lives with his wife Beverly in Cornwall on Hudson, NY.
MORE RESOURCES:
Relationships - Google News |
|
|
|
RELATED ARTICLES
How to Ask for a Gratifying Sex Life So your relationship has changed over the years since you said "I do" and sex isn't what it use to be. First you should know that this is normal and common place in the majority of marriages. The Key to Ending Pain With Others It has taken me 40 years to learn exactly how to free myself from pain with others. After reading the book The Dammapada I sat under a tree to contemplate, and meditate on the wisdom I was soaking in to the depths of my heart, mind and soul. How to Choose Your Life Partner? You have reached the age where you can start thinking seriously on your wedding day. You would like a steady partner, whom which you could spend the rest of your life with. Making Passion More Passionate Somewhere between the first kiss and growing old together, many couples experience dormant growth phases during their relationship, leaving one, if not both partners with a need for greater input, emotionally and/or physically.The process of emotional growth is both independent, and uncomfortable. Relationship Advice: 10 Ways to Survive a Break Up Break ups are never easy. You are a bundle of jealous, hurt, angry, resentful emotions. Feel Like a (Romantic) Kid Again If the start of the school year makes you a little nostalgic about your own school days, why not take a little trip: back to your own childhood! Make a date with that special someone and act like children again. You'll soon see that this child-like fun can be just as romantic as a grown-up date (and a whole lot easier on the budget!)Buy some bubble gum. How Much Time Do You Invest in Relationship Maintenance? When starting a new relationship, we usually adopt a subconscious idea as to how much maintenance this connection will need. Usually, if given some thought, we can throw a microscope over this concept while it is in its fledgling state. The Unfairly Judged Professor An All Too Familiar TaleShe takes her teaching responsibilities seriously; she is committed to making a difference in her students' lives. She prepares her syllabus meticulously, with class-by-class activities and assignments, the most relevant and up to date readings, illustrative cases, experiential activities. Preteen Relationships Even preteens have relationships that are important to them. In this critical time, though, the most important preteen relationship is always with parents. Romantic Gifts - 10 Sizzling Ways to Give Them When it comes to giving a romantic gift, it's not just what you give, but how you give it. For the most impact, creativity is more important than price. Great Relationships: 4 More Dumb MIstakes and 4 Smarter Moves to Make 1) Treat the family you have come from as more important than the family you are creating. Put your parents' opinion and happiness above those of your spouse. Proper Flower Etiquette Flowers are great gifts for practically any occasion, but there are some basic rules of flower etiquette. With the popularity of ordering flower delivery online, some buyers may not get the sound advice they'd get from a local florist. Great Relationships: How to Get the Spark Back Losing the spark - simply, if you will, falling out of love - is a natural and widespread phenomenon in long-term relationships.As a matter of fact, most of these relationships experience an ebb and flow that is quite normal and to be expected. Can Men And Women Be Friends? Or When Harry Met Sally Did He Really Just Want to Jump Her Bones? Men and women can't really be just friends, can they? Of course not. There's always that pesky sexual tension to contend with. A Look at Interracial Relationships There's something about America, our history, our values or maybe the very contradictions of our society that can still make interracial relationships a lot more difficult than others. Most relationships deal with mostly internal pressures with perhaps a little added tension from family or friends. An Introduction to Relationships "Love makes the world go around" was true when it was first uttered many years ago and remains just as true today. Love is what everybody is after. Playing the Part A revelation came to me at the most unsuspecting time. During one of the most mundane things I do in my structured and routine lifestyle, while reading my redeye on my daily commute home from the city. Top Ten List of What to Do and What Not to Do in Relationships Most of us who have been intimately involved with someone beyond the infatuation stage know that relationships are like a rollercoaster ride. When things are good, they are very, very good. Lists, Lists, and More Lists Every person that thinks something is amiss in their relationship wants to know, what are the signs that my partner is cheating on me. Well guess what! These signs can leave you with more doubts than anything else. Daisies A Story About Life "I love daisies too," she told him several nights after they first met. She wasn't sure why she blurted it out but it seemed the normal thing to say considering the conversation they were having.
|
| home | site map |
| © 2006 |
