Relationships Information

Relationship Problems: Solvable or Unsolvable


Every so often, I will hear a relationship speaker claim that they have never had a fight or problem in their marriage. My response to such a claim is that the person is either

1) lying or

2) certainly can't relate to me.

All love relationships have their share of problems, or to use the popular phrase, all relationships have issues.

In general, relationship issues can be divided into two categories:

solvable and unsolvable.

Solvable relationship problems

Solvable relationship problems are generally related to the needs you have in a relationship. An unmet need leads to a problem or issue. Some relationship needs are emotional needs and some are called functional needs. An emotional need is what you need to feel in order to feel loved in a relationship. A functional need is what you need for your life to work in a way that fits for you while in a relationship.

The good news is that needs are negotiable, and there are lots of ways to meet a need. The way to tell if something is a need for you or not, is that if it were not met, you would experience an issue every time. So meeting needs are very important, and are the difference between being happy or unhappy in a relationship.

Unsolvable relationship problems

Unsolvable relationship problems are generally related to what are called your requirements. Whether you are aware of it or not, whether you know them or not, you do have non-negotiable requirements. These requirements have to be met in order for a relationship to work for you. If even one of these requirements is missing the relationship will not work for you.

Requirements are relationship breakers. The problem is that we often treat our requirements as factors that are negotiable. They are not. Or we go into a relationship where we know an important factor does not exist, yet believe, hope or rationalize (rational lies) that somehow this will change once we get married.

For example, I once worked with a client who had a requirement that she have children. When she married her husband, he was ambivalent at best about children. She hoped he would change his mind. He didn't. The marriage ended. This is a great example of a non-negotiable requirement, because you cannot have half a child.

Visit SecretsofGreatRelationships.com for tips and tools for creating and growing a great relationship. You can also subscribe to our f*r*e*e 10 day e-program on how to enrich your relationship today, from relationship coach and expert Jeff Herring.


MORE RESOURCES:

Guardian book club: Relationships
guardian.co.uk, UK - 5 hours ago
Their relationships, therefore, are not exactly predictable. In the first chapter, there is some peculiar triangle involving Maretta, who sits silently in ...


Endpaper: Meaningful relationships with readers
Telegraph.co.uk, United Kingdom - 5 hours ago
The most productive relationship to arise from this latest example of the publishing industry's dogged pursuit of diversification could prove to be between ...


Best Syndication

Building a Downline with Relationships
Best Syndication, CA - 8 hours ago
It’s under the surface a relationship business. And by creating and maintaining a strong relationship with your downline, you can quickly achieve everything ...


Lasting relationships
Jamaica Observer, Jamaica - 21 hours ago
Maintaining lasting relationships requires constant building and nurturing. We must place high values on people, God does! Give others the benefit of ...


Relationships are truly a family affair
Cape Breton Post, Canada - 12 hours ago
It’s funny how our own relationships affect those around us. From friends to significant others, the company we choose plays a valuable role in the way we ...


SMS snooping can doom relationships
Times of India, India - Aug 28, 2008
It also revealed that 73% of these sneaky text checkers have found out things they later wished they hadn't, and 10% ended their relationship because of SMS ...


Examiner.com

Relationships Examiner
Examiner.com - 16 hours ago
Her approach examines how relationships in work, home, and environment contribute to our well-being. The previous post is an example of the parent child ...


Female guard accused of having sexual relationships with inmates
New Richmond News, WI - 15 hours ago
A female guard at a state minimum-security prison is on administrative leave, after two inmates said they had sexual relationships with her. ...


Senior Fundraising and Relationships Manager
Third Sector (registration), UK - 18 hours ago
You will need to be a competent and experienced person with excellent personal interaction and relationship skills and the ability to influence individuals. ...


Examiner.com

Relationships Examiner
Examiner.com - 16 hours ago
Her approach examines how relationships in work, home, and environment contribute to our well-being. I laugh every time I see this old Staples “Back to ...

Relationships - Google News

home | site map
© 2006